Greater Empathy? Yes, please!

The amount of talk surrounding the concept of empathy has exploded over the last few years. Though it was something that was spoken of before the pandemic struck in 2020 the research and discussion base for this concept saw incredible growth as we saw the need to be able to come alongside others in a new light. As the discussion grew it eventually moved itself towards the question of “How do we raise empathetic kids?” Teachers, parents and experts all threw ideas around like confetti and few made much of an impact. Had they only looked in an unlikely spot, they would have found a strategy that over time has proven its ability to help children learn empathy. They needed to be looking into books.

As we study different thoughtful reading comprehension strategies we see the ways in which we further engage in a text through the use of each strategy. We become more invested in stories and with characters as we read thoughtfully and mindfully pay attention to our own metacognition – not sure what that means, check out this older blog post. When we become more invested in characters we begin to care about them. This non-relationship is one-sided and uncomplicated so it provides a wonderful training ground for empathy.

Since there is no true relationship between a reader and a character, there is no risk in inferring the emotions of a character. Taking risk out of the equation allows the reader (or listener) to make mistakes and learn about emotions and their roots without the chance of failure, without the chance ruining the relationship. The safety net that books create in this social dance is wonderfully freeing. And while it is possible to use this net on your own, most children will not. Most children will not infer how a character is feeling without having practiced this process with an adult several times. So how do we go about practicing?

1. Choose a book where the characters’ feelings are quite apparent but not stated.
   • Here are a few of our favorite choices.
     • The Princess and the Pizza
     • Dragons Love Tacos
     • A Friend Like Ed
     • Edwin Speaks Up
2. Start reading the book.
3. At the first instance of a clear emotion, ask the child how the character is feeling and how they know. Better yet, have them fill in the “I think . . . because” inferring sentence stem. Feel free to share your insights too. In fact, sharing your inferences often help kids feel more comfortable about doing it themselves – modeling works.
4. Continue reading and at each noticeable emotion, repeat step three.

Once we learn to distinguish emotions, we can learn to navigate those emotions with people. We can learn to be empathetic. Books truly are a gateway to learning and not just learning about facts.